A lesson in Humility
بِسۡمِ ٱللهِ ٱلرَّحۡمَـٰنِ ٱلرَّحِيمِ
In the Name of Allah Most-Compassionate, Most-Merciful
Here is a story written by a sister who gained an insight into humility from Allah subhanhu wa ta’ala in the blessed environs of Masjid al-Haraam. When I came across it a few years ago it brought tears to my eyes (and still does), no end of guidance, inspiration and a humble lesson in humility. May you also gain great benefit from it as I did. The sister will narrate her story:
A Lesson in Humility
“Rumi said it just right when he said: “Whether you are fast or slow, eventually you will find what you are seeking. Always devote yourself whole heartedly to your search. Even though you may limp or be bent double, do not abandon your search, but drag yourself towards it.” Here insha’Allah you will see why.”
“Today was our last day in Makkah. My Aunty and I decided to go to Masjid al-Haraam to pray and also to do some last minute shopping in the area. Once there, she suggested that we do the farewell tawwaf of the Kaaba. Now, it was burning hot and my thoughts, having already performed Umrah, was that I was hesitant stand outside in the glaring heat, smothered by the great crowd. But it struck me and I felt ashamed to realise that here I was, ready to brave that same heat, for the sake of a few riyals worth of shopping, yet not to make tawwaf of the Kaa’ba especially as there was no knowing whether I’d ever be able to come back to Makkah again. So I made du’a and started. Alhamdulillah, Allah (swt) made it made easy for us…there was a cool, gentle breeze that would always greet us at the Station of Ismail, sent no doubt, by Allah (swt).
At first, my concentration was divided between making tawwaf and counting down the numbers so that I could get out of the heat, as well as trying to make dhikr. But Subhanallah, my attention was caught by a one-legged man, making tawwaf on crutches. I thought, “Mashallah, good for you!” and smiled as I said salaam to him. But then, later, I saw something that will stay with me forever, insha’Allaj if I’m lucky. There, on the ground was a legless man, slowly making tawwaf at great effort using only a block of wood to move himself forward around the Kaa’ba. He neither looked impatient, or hot or resentful; he looked happy and focused on what he was doing. This man loved Allah (swt) so much, was so sincere in his emaan, that the powerful heat, the suffocating crowds, or the lack of legs to walk on still couldn’t stop him from making tawwaf.
Subhanallah, here I was, with two perfectly healthy, strong legs and yet I had come reluctantly….thinking that I had already done three umrahs and that that was quite enough. I have never been more ashamed of myself as I was in that moment. What must Allah (swt) have thought of me? And Subhanallah, what a difference there was in that man’s faith and mine! Watching him struggle to make tawwaf, I questioned whether I have ever struggled with that much passion for anything to please Allah (swt) for any form of worship? When did pleasing Allah (swt) and worshipping Him ever seem as important to me as making tawwaf was for this legless man? His entire being was focussed on achieving this one ambition.
I knew that I had a long, long way to go before I could come even a little bit close to being loved by Allah (swt), close to striving as he was striving. What I needed to do was perfectly obvious: I needed to ask Allah (swt) to allow me to have the type of emaan possessed by that legless man in Makkah. He was dressed in rags, and I in a beautiful new outfit, but there was no doubt as to which one of us was richer.
Now, as I sit here on the plane back to Miami, I feel afraid of falling back into the same state that I was in before I left for Madinah. Insha’allah I pray that these two weeks will allow me to be a better person, a better Muslim, for the rest of my life.
Yesterday, as I was making Saee (walking between Mount Safa and Mount Marwa seven times), I was feeling tired because of the heavy bag I was carrying. Going back and forth between Safa and Marwa, I suddenly realized that this is similar to what I imagine it will be like for us in the Hereafter, crossing over the Sirat, the path of Hellfire. Some of us will cross it so fast; it will be like we flew faster, even than the speed of light. While others will travel at different speeds, proportionate to the amount of sins weighing us down – just as my bag was, in that moment, weighing me down.
My friend Danya asked repeatedly to take a turn holding my bag but I refused and insisted on lugging it around myself. Because when I am on that Bridge, there won’t be any way to ask someone else to carry my “baggage” for me… and I wanted to think about just how awful and tiring this earthly experience was in the hopes that the memory will stay with me, and make me remember the Sirat – and, accordingly, “pack lightly”. Insha’allah Ameen.
Allah (swt) has been so incredibly kind in allowing me to have these two blessed weeks. It makes me think of the strange parallel between my life and that of Rasool’Allah (saw) in this particular regard. When he was feeling disheartened and saddened, Allah (swt) blessed him with the Isra’ and Mi’raj in order to heal his spirits and to comfort his soul. I wasn’t given a chance to visit Allah (swt), but was brought by Him (swt) to visit His House instead. I wasn’t blessed with the Mi’raj but was granted the blessing of Madinah instead. But the end result was exactly the same: a beautiful, soothing healing, and a sense of being comforted by the love and kindness of God.
Subhanallah, it is true what Allah (swt) says in the Qur’an: “Never will you be able to count the blessings of your Lord.” Alhamdulillahi Rabbil ‘Alameen. O my Lord, truly Thou art the Most-Forgiving, the Most-Kind.”
So you see Rumi did say it just right when he said: “Whether you are fast or slow, eventually you will find what you are seeking. Always devote yourself whole heartedly to your search. Even though you may limp or be bent double, do not abandon your search, but drag yourself towards it.”
